The little Big Fight

it creeps up on me
as slimy as ever,
i writhe in its touch
entangled in its gossamer,
then it pops up a question:
“when will you, my dear?”

i jostle around
in my wonderland surreal,
juggling the question
not believing i’m in peril
i pretend to have not heard –
the omen that is now so real

the writing is etched on the wall
its naked elements exposed
i give it one last shot
perhaps it is all I’ve got
alas! the will is lost in vain…
and my conscience wins again!

P.S: every morning my conscience teases me – wake up at 6, huh?

उड़ रहे हैं हम जाने किस ओर. . .


एक कटी पतंग की जैसी डोर
उड़ रहे हैं हम जाने किस ओर
कभी ऊँचे पेड़ो से तकराकर लहराते
तो कभी हवा के तेज़ झोकों से आज़ाद हो जाते

हैं सफ़र यह निरंथर, न रुखेगी कभी
जो मिली कुशी, तो लगे जिंदगी
और कही मिले निराशी, तो लगे बंदगी
लो बन के अरमान, हम उड़ चले

चार अक्षर ही लिखे ते नए पन्ने पर
फिर आया बुलावा – एक आवाज़ ऐसी
न चेहरा ता और न थी कोई दिलचस्पी
जब समज आया की बहुत देर हो चुकी

लो फिर निकल लिए हम बोरिया भांद कर
नए राहें और नए मंजिलों के खोज पर
एक कटी पतंग की जैसी डोर
उड़ रहे हैं हम जाने किस ओर…

फिर कर शुरुवात …

नन्हे क़दमों से शुरू किये
जो सफ़र कोमल हाथों के सहारे
लो आज मांगे साथ दुबारा
तुम नहीं तो जग बेगाना

फिर आ कड़ी हूँ मैं चौराहे पर
किस राह पर मंजिल लिखी हैं ?
काले बादलो से लगता हैं दर
तुम्हारे आँचल में समेट, होना हैं बेफिकर

याद हैं मुझे वो एक रूपये का सिक्का
रोज जमा कर मुझे अमीर बना देना
कब बन गयी तीन रूपये का जुगाड़
कर दिया हर नसीयत तेरी बिगाड़

लो कहो ‘ फिर कर शुरुवात…’
ख्वाब शीशों का नहीं, यकीन दिला दो
तुम्हारी छोटी छोटी बातों में छिपा हैं खज़ाना

लो आज मांगे साथ दुबारा
तुम नहीं  तो जग बेगाना …

Pic courtesy :

In circles…

Beyond the unknown, yonder our arguments
I feel your smile – the smile that knoweth all

As the eternal mystery commenced
You chose me just as I chose you
Yet I felt this choice to be in vain
Yet I was playing the denial game
All awhile, quiet annoyed with you

And as the mystery unfolded with time
Along came the storm, the surges gushed in
In all its wilderness, they snatched you within
I was left aghast, my feeble mind dislodged
For the first time I saw, that which was

You strived to not let go of me
You fumbled around helplessly
Like a true warrior, you rose above
In numbed realization, in divine bow
It was the moment of Truth for me
That which triggered a whole new quest

And in that quest I happened to see
A time, a memory, a forgotten me
In which I felt you and I felt the vast
And as it all is in a constant state of flux
A flux that drove me by kind insight
Through a journey – a bewitching flight

No matter what ebbs and tides lay in it
No matter the debates about virtue and vice
As time stills the eternal menace
I find myself moulding unknowingly
And before I saw the carvers’ knife
I had realized – I had become you
The you, I never knew about
The you with the smile that knoweth all…

P.S: Today is a special day. It is the third anniversary of my dad’s passover to the infinite skies. This poem is my message to him and I know he will understand and smile! Yes, there are mutual jokes in it 🙂
Sorry friends, I’ve disabled comments for this one… n thank you all for respecting the need for silence between us.

The evil in me (a retourne)

too conscious to evolve am i
under his sly, scrutinous eyes
they survive on  eternal seduction
for him no bell tolls, for he no longer dies

under his sly, scrutinous eyes
i lay defeated in unholy highs
as Satan’s spider twines and swings
an evil gossamer binds my wings

they survive on eternal seduction
his proverbial snake at the alter of suffocation
his action impromptu, my wrath undefined
i lay in chaos, my ideals crucified

for him no bell tolls, for he no longer dies
for all that is evil in my dark insides
is a manifestation of him, a hungry parasite
he is in me and i am his host entwined!

P.S: This was my first attempt at a retourne, inspired by Kartz!

Farewell to a Star…

with hope, you lit up our lives
with compassion, you touched our souls
every single day, in every passing moment
you taught us love and its inherent sacrifice
in the short time that you were here
we wonder why He called you there
it’s just too early, just not fair
may the Lord bless your soul
may you never cease to shine
on this crossover divine
P.S: Dedicated to Tina who is no more amongst us. Wish I could know you more, girl!

And when the golden sun was setting…

When the golden sun was setting…

amongst the countless rivers flowing
from the purity of thy bosom
there emerged a beautiful rose
the one that beholds, bewitches
but can prick without a spell

To be swept away, thorn and all
down deep valleys, trembling past
the currents crashing, nature’s fury
the rocks striking, nature’s jury?
alas! neither current nor rock
could break her spirit, as she glides by

Downstream she floats, now placid
across little hammocks, little pebbles
a bunch of kids are struck in awe
amidst the enchanting spell
she casts upon her beholders

Lazily she calms down, her strife was of yore
amidst the old hamlet’s tranquil pond
the water is turbid and quiet now
underneath it hid creatures, big and small
does each have a story
of its downstream journey?

Then arose a moon, which lit up the sky
captured by the pond as a billion stars shone by
she glances at her mirror, her resting place
and now it’s her turn to be enthralled
by nature’s tricks and plays!

For there lay on the surface,
an image so heavenly
they may call it a lotus,
a flower with a thousand petals
to be serenaded amongst the murk
to be worshipped with the gods
so, doth the name alter thy strife?

She closes off her petals and sinks for the night
to be awake, to rise and to shine
to welcome at the break of dawn
the golden sun that arises yet again.
to be called a lotus, o! so pure, so divine!

The Age of Innocence

jasmines adorned her soot hued hair
some dad’s little princess, wasn’t she?
a sari the pride of a cherry draped
carefree in cheap gold embroidery
faux gems serve to fill the void
a void ciphering into another
some mum’s dream come true alas
cat calls welcome her as she dares
to roam amongst the fortunate us

she is the queen of the streets
her strides, magnificent and bold
enchanting, enamoring, enticing
despite the weather so cold
‘if he were here, o if only he were here,
i would seldom walk one step more’

her thirst for love, an unfulfilled desire
her clothes are often torn apart
many a man has left his stench
but not one dares to steal her heart
‘won’t mum teach me to sew?
wont she come to purify –
the scents of sins stacked within?’

her eyes moisten reminiscing
the ghosts of an era bygone
yet she seeks a path; a fresh, raw path –
unexplored, holding promises galore
wiping her tears, she seeks to return;
a return to the Age of Innocence

‘dad, mum, where are you?
the hide n seek is past due
i wish no more to breathe
this stench of other’s sins
i want to smell the warmth
of the purest form of love
so, take me in your arms
as I end this wretched bond’,
so saying she ends her beat